A Serious Relationship = Serious Talks About Money.

• If you’re in a relationship and thinking about marriage,….. STOP.
• Now is the time to have some very serious conversations about the elephant in the room………Money.
• How the mindset about finances and how the lifestyle of each of you is impacted by it.
• Are you on the same page about how money is spent and more importantly… saved?
• The only way to know is to ask…Time for show and tell…beginning with how much debt your intended is in……credit card debt, college loan debt, car loan debt, monthly debt,..any debt.  Specifics……scrutinize statements.  You need to know all this before moving forward.
• Know how much the other has saved…..specifically in any Retirement Accounts, Cash Reserve 6-12 month ‘Cushion” Account, Liquid Emergency Account, and regular checking and savings.
• You should know and have the same thoughts about how money is spent, if you stay within a budget and if you save while your intended is a spendthrift, or wasteful in general,
• Find out if each of you  have the same goals about how money is saved for now (emergency accounts)  and your future (retirement accounts)…. Discipline of doing this is imperative.
• You should know how and if they save, can budget, pay bills in full and on time, avoid fees. Now is the time for a financial audit.  It’s necessary before you marry.  Show and tell. If not, you’re going in blind.  It will – most definitely – come up in the future.
• Be very aware that any debt of the other person becomes yours as well….As soon as you say “I do”  The “I do” not only means marriage vows, it also means “I do know that I’m now paying off your debt”.   Any and all debt of theirs, is now yours too. You need to know all this….it’s imperative that you find out — before you say your vows!
• Knowing there’s a problem now, sure beats finding out there’s a problem later. If you aren’t on the same page with money matters, postpone, or put off completely any plans unless and until their debts are paid.
• Know also that once married, you will share their Credit Score — Their mess will become your mess…..Their debt will bring your score down.
• It’s better to walk away now, rather than find in the not too distant future that no matter how disciplined you’ve been at handling your finances, you are now in a financial hole because you have married someone who doesn’t have the same financial mindset as you.